Becoming a parent is a moment of joy and excitation for every couple, the experience however, is different for everyone. For those who have become parents through a smooth process it is a moment of pure delight and happiness. But for those parents who have been through rough and tough before conceiving a baby and had hard time getting pregnant due to infertility of some kind, the experience is completely different. It does bring all the joy and pleasure that any parents get, but they do have to cope with their earlier stress and anxiety developed due to infertility and the worries they have had during their infertility.
In our society there is ample of guidance available for infertility related issues. But once pregnant, the community lacks the required support the couples need in parenting after infertility. Here we will discuss four major steps which are required to master the art of parenting after infertility.
DEPRESSION DURING PRENATAL STAGE:
Every woman gets depressed during pregnancy at one stage or another, but it comes natural. However, for the ex-infertile women the stress is double. They have to deal with the infertility depression along with the common pregnancy issues. This creates kind of confusing situation which needs to be focused on. If you are going through one such phase, it is highly advisable to see a psychiatrist for the purpose. A slight treatment can make your pregnancy very smooth and stress-free.
DON’T BE OVER-CAUTIOUS:
Mothers are the guardian-angels for their babies. When babies are born, mothers are very cautious about them. However, for women who had been through trouble in getting pregnant and who had tried several IVF’s before conceiving a child, it is natural to be extra cautious about their children. It is good to be cautious about children, but over cautiousness about your babies may deprive you of sleep and negatively affect your health. You have to control your emotions and look at the fellow mothers and see how they handle their babies.
LEAVE YOUR INFERTILITY BEHIND:
Once you have a baby after a long infertility period, you’ve got to brace up for the tiresome period of first year, where it is said that children will only “Eat, poop and sleep”. You cannot let your infertility stress interrupt your life as a new parent. You will have to leave the infertility and all those old worries of not becoming a parent, behind. You have already conquered what you’ve always feared. It’s time for you to focus and cherish the moments with your baby.
DEALING WITH TODDLER AFTER INFERTILITY:
Talking of people with long infertility period in life we have two different cases of becoming parents of a toddler. Either you have given birth after a long infertility or you have decided to go for adoption.
Natural Birth after Long Infertility:
In this case, since you’ve had a long experience in prenatal period and first year of your child and you would have conquered most of your depressive feelings from infertility, so you are in pretty good position to handle your child. However, you still need to communicate regularly with fellow mothers to make sure you don’t feel any different for having a baby after long time.
Adoption after Infertility:
If you have decided to adopt a child after spending a long period of infertility, you need to be very careful about parenting. It’s the right time for you to use your will power and burry all your worries and stress. You’ve always wanted a child and you have it now, shower them with all the love you have secured for your children. If at times you feel uncomfortable and haunted by your thoughts of infertility, you should try to communicate with fellow moms of toddlers and share your experience with them. You can also look for “Parents after infertility community” in your local area and you can gain a lot of knowledge from there on how to handle the situation.
Parenting after infertility is not a smooth task to perform; it’s a complete change of your lifestyle. It takes time to change your mind-set about things and leave your past worries and concerns behind. Parenting after infertility can rightly be called as an art, which needs to be mastered. With a bit of self control and regular communication with fellow parents you can easily master this art.